i asked my italian grandfather if the rough parts of italy were called the spaghetto and look at me w/ so much shame
tell me a joke
mom can i borrow $100,000 please i’ll give u it back when im rich and famous
- 1950's lyrics: Love me tender, love me true, all my dreams fulfilled. For, my darling, I love you, and I always will.
- 1960's lyrics: When the girl in your arms is the girl in your heart, then you've got everything.
- 1970's lyrics: I hope you don't mind that I put down in words, how wonderful life is while you're in the world.
- 2012 lyrics: Almost drowned in her pussy so I swam to her butt.
me in any situation
i’m in a love triangle with me myself and i
i was at the bus stop with my sister the other day and for no apparent reason, she says: ‘dude, there are more dead people in the world than living people’ and the woman standing beside me whispered ‘holy shit’ and i fucking lost it
story time
so about 7 months ago, my girlfriend at the time asked me to move in. so i did and we lived together for roughly 6 weeks. she asked me to move out until i was mature enough to live with a girl because in those 6 weeks i drew a dick on her face while she was sleeping 11 times.
i always seem to follow all the nice people/ nice parts of the fandom
the bad parts of the fandom seem like some far off land that i only hear about through folklore and the tales of swarthy fishermen
